Your worth is not measured by how others feel about you, it's by how you feel about yourself.
There are times that someone's perception can influence the way you feel about yourself, but don't let that define you. You know what you like and dislike, you know what you want (even when it seems you don't). Everyone makes mistakes, it's how you go about making things right for you that matters. There are times that we hold on to things, whether it be a grudge, regret, hate, or even love for something we know may be doing more harm than good.
You are worth so much more than the box you place yourself in. Many men and women carry around this secret shame with them that ends up impacting how they feel. For a lot of men, they would rather not show emotions, for they may be ridiculed. Many women may feel they are wrong for the way they dress or speak with people. Society tells men it's wrong to show emotions, but what happens when that pressure builds, and there's no outlet. Society tells women to watch how you dress and don't say no to people who want to pursue you, but what happens when a woman is harassed, and she followed your rules.
I should not be defined by what I choose to wear if I want to show my emotions, or even if I don't want to speak to you. You have nothing to prove to anyone—your worth deals with your feelings and interpretations.
Here are five things that definitely do not define your worth no matter what society says or what happens to be trending:
1. Your social media following
The way social media is set up people believe if you don't have 5,000 followers, you are nothing. I've seen many people who have a huge following but 20- 40 likes on a post. That following has nothing to do with how you should measure yourself. Some people ignore you just because it's you.
2. Your job
Many people think that if they just get the right job, then people will respect them or everything will be perfect. The problem with this is, are you trying to please another person, or is the job right for you? Did you apply because it can help you do what you want or you just saw people making money? You need some type of motivation, and it cannot be just because someone said you can't. Why else do you want it?
3. Your grades
I don't care what anyone tells you. Your grades do not define you, your intelligence, or your worth. I know people who had 1.7 GPAs that have companies and non-profit organizations doing well just as I know people who had 3.9 GPAs who aren't doing anything. Yes, grades can be important, but how you learn as an individual and who your teachers are has a significant impact on that. I learn entirely different than some of my peers, and there is nothing wrong with that.
4. Your appearance
I may not be everyone's cup of tea, and that is alright. I am not for everyone. If I don't like myself, how can I have anyone else tolerate me? No one is obligated to like me, not even my family. I have acne scars on me, but that doesn't mean I can't be beautiful. Some days I dress like I don't have anything, but it doesn't mean I don't. I cannot let someone else's notion of beauty define what I have for myself, and you shouldn't either. Don't compare yourself to the others you see; you see what they show on the outside, not what they have on the inside or what it took to look or have what they do.
Your worth is all about you. Be selfish with yourself; it is okay. Say NO, they will be perfectly fine. Cry, laugh, dance, sing, or whatever else makes you feel good. It is not my place to tell you how to express yourself, and you shouldn't let others do so either.
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